Welcome Newton!

In February, I started to grow a little poppyseed in my tummy. It has gone through many different stages of development already. This week it is the size of a fig, so we're calling it Newton. The girls don't like the name (especially Nikki!) but Tad and I are a bit amused. They don't seem to understand that this name is only temporary and by next week we will have a new nickname for it.

At my age having another baby was definitely not what we were looking for, but the Lord had other plans for us as we have learned since moving to Wyoming nine years ago. As I think back to our moving here just before Christmas 2000 with five young daughters - ages 8 to 3 months - we have had more things happen than I ever imagined. Tad has grown in the gospel as he has served as a counselor in the bishopric followed by bishop and now in the stake presidency. These callings have given our family more blessings than we can count.

One significant change we made occurred a couple of years ago when the Ogden Temple president challenged us in stake conference to attend the temple once a month. Even when we lived close to a temple we were not as faithful in our attendance as we knew we should have been, but we accepted that challenge and have found planning on when to go to the temple each month has been a highlight we look forward to often. It should be noted that the closest temple is at least four hours away and during the winter the passes when open are often dangerous to drive over.

In October of last year we had gone to Rexburg, Idaho, to visit Talia as well as get in a session at the temple. I have never had the spirit speak to me the way it did and I was afraid to really acknowledge the impressions I had for a couple of weeks. When I had finally accepted what had happened and shared the experience with Tad, his feelings were of shock, much like mine. After much prayer and fasting we knew we were to follow these promptings and with a leap of faith moved forward. I think the fact that I was able to get pregnant as quickly as I did is another testament to the promptings I received in the temple and we are now looking forward to our brood's continued growth.

Am I saying that everyone should have what feels like a supersized family in an average sized home? Definitely not! To add to our already feeling of coziness in our home, Tad began a new job this past week which will have him working primarily from home so one of our precious bedrooms was sacrificed to become an office. On the upside of things, Tad will be here when I have not so good days (which seem to finally be ebbing) and Talia will have a closet to call her own although she will most likely be sleeping on an air mattress in the office when she does come home.

We were a bit reluctant to tell people at first, worried about what people would think, but in reality, those things shouldn't matter. This is between me and Tad and the Lord and that's all that matters. Fortunately, there has been nothing but excitement shown to us by those near and dear to our family. I was told last week while we were in the temple and I shared my experience with the workers there that this child will be blessed by coming to a home where its parents loved the temple and attended often. I didn't know what to say about that at the time, but I know they were right and we look forward to November when this little one will bless our home with its spirit. What a great way to bring in the holiday season (I know it's a little early to celebrate but I gotten a bit of a reputation for being a planner and looking ahead).

New Year -- New Life

So I quit my job back in December. Although I still considered myself mainly a stay-at-home mom, Tad and I felt that the time I spent at the computer was keeping me from what I really wanted to do, just be a mom. This change has taken me a while to adjust to and I find that I have spent many of my days just more or less spinning my wheels. Granted, games and stories with Chloe as well as playing pretend or whatever else she dictates has been a lot of fun, but there has to be some balance. For too many years I put off projects, only getting about halfway through them, and I had big dreams for getting the projects completed.

I had a sort of epiphany last week as I read a friend's blog and she wrote about her "skinny jeans." I, too, have that seemingly unobtainable dream of being something I'm not (in the personal size department). Six kids in 16 years kind of takes it out of you, especially if the first three were born within 5-1/2 years of each other, from #1 to #4. I love my family but I have decided it's time to find me once again, come back to having an identity other than somebody's mom or the wife. There are no cheerleaders encouraging me on this journey, just my own stubborn will and a hope for being an example for my girls. I guess Chloe has heard it all enough as she asked me today, "Can I exercise too? My tummy's fat." I love how innocent a nearly 4-year-old child can be. I don't want the girls to have negative body images of themselves as I struggled with almost my entire life. They are beautiful, bright, and so creative in their own respective rights. I need to let them know how grateful I am to have been blessed with each and every one of them. Also, as I have told Tad for years, it's his just due after how much he liked the girls before he met me. Now he has an idea of what it's like to be in the father's shoes of a teenager daughter!

I love this time of year.

I love to be in my home and look out the windows at all the changes going on. I love the colors of the leaves as they change on the trees and then fall to the ground. I love the color of the nearly cloudless sky that seems to stretch on forever. I love the passed on harvest that neighbors share when they have had their fill and know that we were not able to have much of a garden (again, but hopefully next year will be better!) I love the smells of fall, especially the baking that goes on in our house. Something has really gotten into us and we have gone through over 25 pounds of flour in less than a month and the real baking days are still to come.

The snow we had has finally melted and the temperatures are warmer. I was lucky enough to get the leaves all raked and bagged on Saturday and clean up the garden. It was just in the nick of time as today (Tuesday) is overcast and gloomy.

With warm fall smells in the house and the little drizzly rain I want to just curl up on the sofa with a blanket, book and a cup of cocoa. Unfortunately, there is a list a mile long waiting for me to work on. The smells of fall and the desire to bring everyone in close around is such a comfort.

I love the relationships that are built as we all settle in for the winter. There can be many cold days when winter really sets in and I am hoping to have some family time that helps us all develop closer bonds. General Conference was such an inspiring time a couple of weeks ago. I continue to reflect on the words of our prophet and other general authorities and hope that I can begin to incoporate their counsel in our family.

Thomas S. Monson | Principles From Prophets | September 15, 2009 | BYU Broadcasting

Thomas S. Monson | Principles From Prophets | September 15, 2009 | BYU Broadcasting

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What an incredible life this man has lived!

One week ago today we had our last dinner with Talia before she left for school. The sisters were all pretty emotional when it came time for her to say goodbye. Having a child old enough to move out and go to college is a real eye opener. She doesn't seem to need us too much anymore. I love being able to get in touch with her or leave messages when we are just thinking of her. I really feel ancient when I think back 20 years ago when I was in college and only called home occasionally because long-distance phone calls were so expensive. Technology has certainly made keeping in touch so much easier. Just for reference, here are Talia with Chloe in the background in her bedroom of the new apartment.

Monday Tad, Chloe and I (and Talia, too) checked her into her apartment and began trying to help her get settled in. The apartment has six girls, two bathrooms and lots of energy. Those that we met seemed really nice and she will have the opportunity to get involved with many activities on and off campus this next semester. Just for reference, the picture is of Talia (duh!) and Chloe in her bedroom of the new apartment. I wish I had thought earlier to get before and after shots of this room. She had so much stuff that I thought there was no way she was going to be able to keep all of it. As it turns out, almost everything fit and we only brought home a few nonessentials that we decided she really didn't need. She loves being on her own and even though there are still five other girls she is living with, they are not the five she has lived with at home. Nothing better than being away from a whining or teasing little sister.

"Your never lost when you can see the temple."

--Elder Gary E. Stevenson of the Seventy

I'm willing to give this a try!

I'm not really sure how to go about all of this. I spend most of my days sitting at the computer but I listen to the voices of many doctors as well as my children and so I haven't taken the time to become more computer savvy.

Tad and I have been married for so long now it's hard to remember life without our family. Talia is getting ready to leave for college in a month and the girls will be in school in only about two short weeks. I guess I am going to have to try to find some alternative entertainment for Chloe once we are back to just the two of us.

I just want to give this a try and then we will shoot for some fancier options (pictures, music, etc.!) What a week this has been.